Song Lyric
Tourniquet
Evanescence
I tried to kill the pain
But only brought more (so much more)
I lay dying
And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal
I'm dying, praying, bleeding and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved?
Am I too lost?
My God, my Tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My God, my Tourniquet
Return to me salvation
Do you remember me?
Lost for so long
Will you be on the other side?
Or will you forget me?
I'm dying, praying, bleeding and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved?
Am I too lost?
My God, my Tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My God, my Tourniquet
Return to me salvation
I want to die
My God, my Tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My God, my Tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My wounds cry for the grave
My soul cries for deliverance
Will I be denied Christ?
Tourniquet
My suicide
Return to me salvation
Return to me salvation
Remember I said I am a firm believer of a "connected" universe(s), it is almost like dimensions within more dimensions. If God exists, HE would be the Guardian Of Dimensions. The way I see it, it is not an easy task, if God is the overarching of those universes, Jesus is probably a more physical one within just 1 universe. It is just a sad story to me, he couldn't even be able to stay alive back in the days, as if he could be in this current world. If that is the case, what is the chance for us to be even get to know (other dimensions), it seems to me that we can't even manage just 1 universe, without killing each other...
Why do I think this?
This song remains me of people with high IQs, but not just IQ alone. If Jesus is real, I guess it is not just being smart, it is like a package of (humility, humanity, benevolence, EQ....), because IQ alone is not enough for someone to be able to understand the spiritual realm fully, and without a good heart, everything might even get twisted (somewhat). It is really an interesting read about 仁 or 인 or じん 心. To me, love is that simple, it doesn't have to be over-complicated. But I do question if our world is design to break the love.
For someone who is kind, smart and have the above qualities, assuming they do end up knowing a little bit, be able to understand a little bit more, I wonder how would they feel to be in this world.
Between "Good" & "Evil", our world seems to be less tolerant at the moment, that clear "cut" itself might already be enough to kill the world. I could only imagine how much pressure would that person gets in his/her life, to be able to withstand that amount of pressure (from both sides), and in this material world, as if that person can really live without money, or the support from others, including love. If he or she has to be strong as an individual, without others, then the chance itself, will probably turn that person into a "cunt", cutting out the together part - no longer together, because of loneliness. Maybe this is why this song gives me that meaning of life, in this current world. Before he/she sees it all, is suicide the only option, or else, they would have gone to the journey of being something else?! It is like how merciful the king can ever be, if he has no power, money or being recognised as one. And life may just be like this, if everything is striped away from this king, will he be kind enough to let himself go, or turn into a killer machine due to his anger?
Once you seen it all, what else can you choose, if you were put into the same situation as him? Is this why "The lifetime suicide mortality for the gifted individuals of the Terman study was 2.25% which is roughly four times the suicide mortality for the general population."? Is this why good people die young? Is this why smarter people may not die young, but if they are good enough, they may just well be? Do we really understand what it means for those who can be autism?
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